Purple Pillow
by Hell's Nightingale
Summary: Ulquiorra hates rich kids. Yoruichi hates maids. And they both hate laundry. Go figure. Inspired by my friends and purely made of boredom. Tiny splinters of UlquiYoru YoruUlqui and even better hint of YoruSoi. AU. One-shot.


He listened to the rich kids on the floor above him laughing and being loud, like usual. How he would love to have the free time to just laze around the house, but it never came. He always had to study, work, learn, and get money for the next rent. He never had time for himself and it did not help that he had to do laundry today too, especially if he hadn't done it in four weeks.

Ulquiorra walked down to the laundry mat with a basket full of clothes. It was troublesome to even start that all of his clothes, which were ironically all the same, were all dirty now. He usually never procrastinated to wash them, but with college how it was…it was kind of hard not to. He allowed himself to shut his eyes briefly to show his annoyance. He didn't like how much homework there was at the college but it kept him busy and he'd soon graduate and have a high paying job soon. He continued to walk down the hallway until he came across the elevator. He was about to walk into it until many girls ran past him into it with giggle.

_I shall take the stairs. _

He walked around the corner and precariously descended the stairs with his clothes basket piled high. Ulquiorra watched the clothes sway from side to side on his basket, warning him if he made any sudden movement they'd fall. He wondered, once again, why he had to wait until he didn't have anymore clothes to go to the laundry mat downstairs.

He slowly made his way down the remainder of the stairs, miraculously not dropping a single article of clothing along the way. He quietly entered the laundry mat that was connected to his apartment building and began to put all his clothes into the washer.

_Whites, whites, whites, whites, and more whites, _Ulquiorra commented while he put his clothes in the washing machine. He applied the right amount of bleach and closed the washer's door before starting it. He stared at his clothes slowly start to rotate in a circular motion as the water poured in.

He averted his gaze to glance around the room. There were numerous other people in the room, and he could not trust any one of them with his vulnerable clothes. He would not allow his clothes to sit in the washer unattended. They could be stolen or played with and he did not have the money to replace ruined clothing at this moment.

His attention soon veered to a loud group of rich kids giving their clothes to the maids that were stationed here who did their laundry for them. Ulquiorra envied that sort of freedom to just give his burdens to someone else and walk off to enjoy his spare time.

Ulquiorra glanced back to his clothes. This would take a long time, he thought before walking to a seat, making sure it was away from everyone, and sat down. He would just have to wait.

…

Minutes passed before he started regretting that he did not bring his study books. It would've been a good time to try and cover up the next chapter they were going to be reading about. He would've liked to be ahead of everyone, but, once again, Ulquiorra did not trust anyone here with his unsupervised clothes.

He eyed the coffee table near him that had piles of magazines on them. He wouldn't dare read any of that trash. Most of it was celebrity magazines or fashion.

_Pure trash._

But one caught his eye. He glanced around to make sure no one was looking before leaning in a little to get a better look.

_How to save-Jobs that will make you millions- Get a hot girlfriend-Football team riot!_ Wait, Ulquiorra glanced back at the two first magazines. How to save a lot of money? How to find a job that will make you millions? He eyed them a little longer, wondering if he should spare a few minute to read these economical magazines. Ulquiorra was about to grab one of the magazines before he withdrew his hand quickly. No, he would not read such an article. He would look like some poor college student in front of these people who he had to share this building with. He lightly glared at every one of them; they were all trash, all useless, especially the rich kids.

He leaned back into his chair in a relaxed posture. He continued to scan through the magazines. He noted how the girl magazines were numerous and the actually interesting ones were rare. The woman magazines had to do with perfume adds or relationship problems, which proved they were weak and over emotional. They couldn't figure things out on themselves and did not deserve a single glance. There was even a girl with purple hair on the cover. It was practically screaming for attention.

He averted his gaze back to his now more interesting clothes that were tumbling in the washer.

…

A loud voice soon echoed through the once silent laundry mat. He glanced towards the entrance to see a purple haired, dark skinned woman walk in with an annoyed look on her face. She had a pillow in her hand. How peculiar.

She wore expensive looking clothes. She looked familiar. Ulquiorra glanced back down at the magazines to notice she was on the cover of one of them, to be specific, on the woman's magazine. How troublesome.

She continued to walk his direction until she turned and sat one seat away from him. He glanced down the room. Every other seat was available. He averted his gaze back at her. Why was she in that chair, close to him, right now?

She continued to mutter something under her breath while looking at the pillow. She soon glanced at him with an agitated facial expression.

"Yes, ok, I am Yoruichi Shihouin. So can you stop staring?" She asked in an exasperated tone. Ulquiorra looked away. How annoying. Was she really that arrogant to think he was gawking at her? She went back to clawing at something on her purple pillow.

"Like I would care," he replied just to burst her haughty bubble. She didn't deserve to think he was obeying her orders. After all, she was just another bratty rich kid.

The maid working at the drop off clothes place groaned about something. She didn't seem like she was enjoying her work.

Yoruichi gave a scoff before retorting with a "Whatever."

She continued to scratch at her pillow. Ulquiorra gave one last glance at her before finally giving up. He would just have to annoy this attention demanding, arrogant woman for now. He looked at the wall that was opposite of the purple haired girl. It wasn't even ten minutes yet.

…

Yoruichi groaned in defeat. "Do you got any of that quick dabbing cleany stuff that's in a stick?"

Ulquiorra continued to ignore her.

"Hey, I am talking to you," Yoruichi called out. Ulquiorra ignored her until she poked his arm. He stiffened and shot his head towards her. Nobody, and he meant NOBODY, ever touched him. And she would not be made an acceptation.

Now that she got his undivided attention, while smirking, she asked again, "So do you got any of that stuff I asked for?"

Ulquiorra felt like getting up and walking away. Why the hell would he have whatever she was asking for?

"No." He simply stated before putting her on ignore again. She scoffed once more.

"You're no help," she stated before getting up. Ulquiorra glanced her way to watch her walk away with her purple pillow. He noticed there was a white stain on it. He wondered what caused that.

She walked up to the maid who was doing her shift on the drop off clothes cleaning service.

Ulquiorra could not help but eavesdrop to satisfy how that stain came to be.

"Soi....stupid…accidently…dumb….all over my pillow." The girl named Yoruichi explained to the maid. The maid, from what he could see, rolled her eyes and seemed to be annoyed.

Yoruichi handed her over the stained purple pillow before walking away. Ulquiorra was about to glance away until he heard the maid speak again.

"Come again," she said in a somber, annoyed voice. Yoruichi stopped in her tracks and turned around with an accusing finger.

"IT'S TOOTHPASTE YOU FUCKING MAID!"

* * *

**A/N:**

**Inspired by my friend Sammy's writing challenge that had to do with a pillow, and to her favorite pairing...even though it is barely hinted, and to a FWD text message I recieved lol. Enjoy. This way made of -pure- boredom. **


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